Belonging……….Be Longing?

 It was 32 degrees below zero the other day, a glorious morning and my husky could not have been happier. This is a winter paradise at 9000 feet, with the nearby peaks reaching to 13,000 feet, thoroughly breath-taking for myself the human. For her?—Well she’s out of her mind with ecstasy, diving off the trail into deep powder and tunneling her way through or sliding down hills on her back. Hysterical. As we trekked through the magnificence, her exuberance and utter delight showed me what I’ve always known, she belongs here.

Well obviously she does, but what about me? Where do I belong? This has been a question that I’ve been revisiting on and off for decades. It also begs me to wonder—How many of us truly know where we belong, and why?

Certainly as the years have added up, comfort within my own skin and a genuine level of happiness have joined me wherever I’m living. Looking at my dog and knowing that deep cold and snow are her element, I’m still wondering what my element is. And is it just me, or are we as a species still longing to find our healthy place within the cosmos?

What are the factors that allow for a comfortable sense of belonging?

Growing up on Long Island, 60 miles out, I never took in what this really meant. Returning many years later and hearing the accents, seeing the ever present Italian last names everywhere—well something clicked, yes this is where I am from. These people are like me, on the outer front anyway. I remember feeling a comfort in this then—and also the feeling that I couldn’t live there again.

Today I’m thrilled and content with many elements of my return to this winter paradise, am happier than I’ve been as a person—and yet—the people here don’t feel like my tribe, my soul family. Our physical fitness and athletic prowess bonds us, but I don’t feel a spiritual connection. I do with the land though, it’s almost impossible not to here. My own sense of contentment? Yes—but true belonging? What would it take, both within me, and within a community for me to feel this? Can we belong anywhere? And what are we belonging to—our families, our towns, our land-base, our race, our species, our planet, our universe? So many layers of possibility.

Being with people who “get us” and that we “get” seems crucial during these rapidly changing times. Being with those who add fuel to our inner burning fires of transformation, a true joy. If this doesn’t occur within our immediate communities we are so blessed today to have the possibility of connecting with people all over the world virtually and this is an enormous gift. What would it really feel like though to be with a gaggle of kindred spirits, creating not only a thoroughly new way of relating to one another, but also a new world?

So am I “Be-ing Longing”? Can I “Be Longing“? Longing can have so many stops along the continuum and like most things a balance is probably preferable. We can become dysfunctional as we long for something, while also allowing our longing to take us to places we might otherwise never reach for. Is longing an inherent part of the creative process?

 How do you relate to this idea of belonging? I’d love to hear what you think and feel about your place in the universe.


5 Responses to “Belonging……….Be Longing?”

  1. Matthew, What an important issue to attend to in all our lives. I face a question in my own self about the concept of Restlessness. Is restlessness a way of my soul moving me forward in my life toward a place more aligned with spirit or can it also be me finding something challenging or uncomfortable about my current place full of lessons…wanting to move away from the discomfort. I suspect it is not either or.

    Thank you again, Maya Christobel

    • I hear you Maya, seems like it could be “both/and”–a lot like many of the issue’s we face today.

      “… soul moving me forward in my life toward a place more aligned with spirit” This says it all doesn’t it?! Nicely put! How do we heed these “calls”? And continually having the presence to be open to them. This is what is being felt by many perhaps.

      Thank you for this!

  2. Bruce Roberto Margarido Says:

    ……………i know of myself, i belong on the side of the ‘road’, with thumb thrust high into the air, gazed fixed on all which approaches and fully present with the possibilities which are about to present themselves. no discriminations here only a deep hunger to embrace that which those powers greater than may offer up. and, ya no the best part………i don’t have to take a loan nor waite in line for some exterior authority to validate if i be-long there. matthew, do you think that there is something wrong with me? or, maybe i’m just an easy date.
    thanks for your good work here……..i feel like i belong. brother brucie

    • bb,
      Good on you for the “road”– analogy and literalization. And the “deep hunger to embrace” is lovely. It’s this hunger that can drive us out of stagnation, isn’t it? And is it only “those powers” that offer up something for us? What role do we have in co-creating what comes before us?

  3. Jonelle Rose Says:

    Belonging signifies that something is missing. A true interior connection to spirit infills all the interior and exterior spaces, leaving the ability to connect with those around me. I love being connected to the Spirit of Truth first because in this connection all other possibilities arise and fill me full with the joy of ‘Being’ alive. No One or nothing can make me feel like I belong to anyone or anything. To me, belonging also signifies and implies ownership of myself and another. My only responsibility is to be connected to the spirit, listen, be guided momentarily and to love unconditional. When I am in my life, I love all that is in me and with me. It is glorious!!!

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